Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
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