You don't have asthma, your pregnant
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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