thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
