You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Someone shattered a urinal.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
