I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
