Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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