Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
you told grandpa to call you daddy
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize