how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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