we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
