the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
