Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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