I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
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