I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Do vagina's smell?
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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