I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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