I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
The uberlube is also flammable
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Randomize
