The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
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