No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
