Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize