I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize