Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
