we're blogging at a bar
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize