i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Randomize
