he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Ketchup is God's man juice
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
