no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize