haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
