I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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