She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
should my penis look like a turkey
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
