i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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