yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
