Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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