smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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