Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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