I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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