Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Randomize
