High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize