I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
