FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
