I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
