i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Randomize
