Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
