somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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