Is it normal to miss your booty call?
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
