I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Randomize