it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
