We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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