Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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