I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
