I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
