Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
