Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
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